CRAIG EDWARD KELSO, HOC, Mr. Dominguez, and the Love of a True Friend

Mr. Dominguez later took on an official capacity in the county jail system, pictured here. With me, he came first and only as a friend -- no badges or officialdom.

I’d been inside for about 24 unbelievably chaotic hours – saw and experienced shit I would never want even my worst enemy to go through. 

Some of you might know my life up to that point provided me with plenty of craziness: holding my mother’s hand as she died, seeing my father’s brains splattered all over a bedspread and down onto carpeting. 

Yeah, and those are just the events I can share. 

In any case, the San Diego County Jail and its holding tanks gave me a whole new look at life.

K-E-L-S-O!!!!!!!!!!!!! rattled out of the speakers. It was loud, deafening.

I jumped out of my bunk. It just could not be a good thing to be called out. I knew that much. There it was, again blaring and insistent.

Get up, get ready. You have a visit, the cop shouted.

A visit? Already? Who the fuck could it be?

I lumbered up a corridor, and into a waiting room. Sat down. Shackled from head to tizzy as Snoop would say.

There wasn’t anyone I could imagine who might come down to visit so quickly.

In he came, beautiful smile and dapperly dressed. He donned an old-timey hat, something straight out of a gangster movie. Before I could say a word, I began to cry. It was a cry I could not control. The combination of where I was, how I was latched to the table, and the sight of him brought it all home emotionally. 

Tears rolled down my face, and I smiled politely.

It’s great to be alive, Craig! he said, and he sat down, placing his hat on the table.

I sobbed like a bitch, laughing in the tears.

He believed what he said. 

He believed every word. He was never insincere to me. We’d worked together for a few years, and I admired him. When he retired, after 25 years, the school and the union planned exactly NOTHING for him. The students adored him, and they came to me in order to give him a proper celebration. We did. I sprung for a limo, and I organized the staff to get it on campus. It was a great ceremony. A lot of fun. Testimonials. He was touched. After he retired, he did what retired people do. He vanished. Didn’t hear from him at all, until this day.

There he was in all his reverend glory.

Yeah, he was/is an ordained Protestant minister. He’d come to minister to me. Honestly I don’t remember much of his sermon, but I know it had a lot of Jesus stuff in it. 

You have to understand how TERRIBLE the charges were. At this point, no one knew anything other than what the television/print media was reporting … along with the internet retards posting incessantly. This man was a pillar of the community, and he was taking a HUGE risk by coming to see me.

He was warm, lovely, and attempted to make me feel as good as anyone could in such a situation.

At some point, I manned up a bit and stopped crying. I remembered how I could make him laugh, and how his laugh would evolve into a full body laugh. I needed him to laugh. I craved it. I often attempt to get people to laugh in fucked up situations. It’s a way to cope with whatever. It’s what I do.

I reminded him about how he’d officiated at several of our colleagues’ weddings.

He beamed and said, I married twenty couples!

Wow, I quipped quickly, I didn’t know you were Mormon!

He almost fell out of his seat. He laughed so hard, the way I remembered him doing when we worked together, that his whole demeanor collapsed in the full orgasm of laughter. His eyes puckered. His shoulders jiggled. He even stomped a foot. His voice rose hoarsely. He coughed, bringing himself back to a reasonable emotional state.

Wiping his eyes with a hanky, he thanked ME.

Unbelievable.

And I mean it. 

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checalaloskelsos@gmail.com
  
Craig Edward Kelso is the author of Anarcho-Capitalism (2014), a primer on the philosophy of peaceful, stateless cooperation. His curriculum vitae include a Bachelor of Arts in Political Science from San Diego State University, and a Post-Baccalaureate secondary education credential in both Social Science and English Language Arts. Kelso taught for nearly a decade in the American public school system, and was voted by colleagues Teacher of the Year, twice in his short tenure, earning numerous accolades from chambers of commerce, mayors, state assembly persons, governors, congresspersons, senators, and even Wal-Mart. Currently he struggles to earn an opportunity to be employed, working as a laborer, dishwasher. He is deliriously happily married to Myra Kelso, living in Southern California with their adorable children.